Pagination Hellscapes

What is Pagination?

Pagination used in websites is the modern day version of pop up ads of the 90’s and early 2000’s.  You know the type.  With a clickbait title like “The reason your dog follows you into the restroom” and you have to click page after page after page after page after page ad infinitum until you finally get to the information you’re after which is “why does my dog follow me into the bathroom”.

Want to see bullshit pagination in action? This was tweeted as “So this is what it means when dogs follow you into the bathroom, I never knew this.”  Paginated Article.

Not all heroes wear capes.  (And why not install the Brave Browser while you’re at it?)

Checking for clues in pagination content by reading the comments section.

Why Pagination is so damn annoying

When you’re presented with an article, you want to read the article, not read one small snippet, then switch to another page to continue reading.  This is the age of the internet, not old BBS times.  We have the capability of loading a lot more information on screen easily and read easily today than we did back when we dialed into BBS’s on our C64’s.

So you read a little bit, click next page.  You do this repeatedly until you actually find the information you’re looking for.  This, in essence, is exactly the same as a website with excessively long loading times and as such I have a special way of dealing with websites that paginate the hell out of their content.

Why is this tactic used so much?

When you want to make a bunch of money on a website you run, you’re going to have ads on it.  The best way to increase ad impressions is to require people to load a new page per paragraph or sentence.  Each time they get you to click “Next” or “Continue Reading”, that’s fresh ad impressions raking in more ad revenue for themselves.  It’s a tactic of greed.  To hell with your time and bandwidth.

In essence, it’s done for a money grab.  Plain and simple.

How to Defeat this Plague?

Hit them in their bouncerate.  If you notice the site is paginated to hell and back, simply close the browser window or tab and leave a comment on the social media post.

Turns out a lot of people have the idea.  Someone is going to post eventually what that page says (as evidenced by the earlier screenshot answering the question of the original post).

I know it all sound super funny, and in all honesty it is.  It should be clear to note to NOT do this when you’re wanting to not piss off readers.  Sure there are a few people who think this kind of format is revolutionary, but that’s a small minority.  It just pisses the rest of us off.

 

 

Just goes to show you how much people hate this shit.  Read through comments of the social media post to escape pagination hell by seeing if someone posted the content you’re after in the comments.  Or take one for the team if it’s not there and find it and post it for them.  Once you notice it’s paginated, leave the page, look for comments.

Let clickbait merchants know that this shit will not be tolerated.

Screenshot from pagination hell website.

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