I strongly dislike speaking because I worry about how I sound, though it doesn’t stop me from making videos and livestreams. I mean I dislike speaking mainly in public. The reason being is that there are far too many people that don’t realize I’m deaf until I tell them, and that’s usually after they get annoyed with me thinking that I’m ignoring them. When I resort to telling them to “pardon my death stare, I’m deaf” for the lip reading aspect, I usually get various comments like the ones below.
- You can’t be deaf, you speak too well
- Deaf people can’t talk
- How are you able to talk then?
- Wow, you speak exceptionally well for a deaf person
And the list goes on and on. The point is, I’ve been through years of speech therapy to train me how to speak properly. It’s not something that happened overnight. I know, crazy ain’t it? That’s what I had to go through being a mainstreamed deaf trained in the dark arts of oralism.
I’m thankful for knowing how to speak properly. I am able to switch to my deaf accent by simply not thinking so much on the words that I speak which is easier on me, but overall being able to speak has opened so many doors for me in my social life and has allowed me to be partnered with a wonderful person who I love dearly, have friends that crack jokes and enjoy company with. My life is rich.
Just the main downside are people that disbelieve I’m deaf just because I can speak well. I only reveal that I’m deaf to people so they don’t get pissed off for me “ignoring” them and to get them to not turn mid sentence or cover their mouth when they’re talking.